Goodbye to You

Confession: I find it abnormally difficult to let go of people.

Maybe it's because I love too completely. Maybe it's because of a fear of change or of the unknown that I harbor deep within me. Maybe it's because I'm more complacent than I feel willing to admit. I'm fairly certain it's a bit of all, but I also feel that it's because Heavenly Father has particularly blessed me with the best sort of friends. They are here, then they're gone & more friends come along that are just as amazing, but the new friends never fill the gap that those before have left.

I think it quite possible that my heart is expanding exponentially every year in order to accommodate for new gaps left. BYU, in fact, has become notorious for creating empty cavities. After spending an entire year coming to know & love so many people in my current ward, it is all coming to an end with a crashing thud. In 2 weeks, we will have dispersed into a nonexistent whole & I do not look forward to that day. I would much rather find a situation where the flow is at least a bit more dulled by consistency. Singles ward, smingles ward. I'm tired of saying goodbye to the people I love, but I suppose it is asked of me for another season, so this too I shall try to endure with a happy heart.